


Breathless

by FawnChara



Category: Jacksepticeye RPF, Jelix RPF, Pewdiepie RPF
Genre: Blackouts, Drug Use, Exhibitionism, Kinda, Light dom/sub undertones, M/M, Parties, Photos, Weed Fic, alcohol use, edibles, friendly blowjobs, snapchat use, this is just a really self indulgent fic tbh
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2017-08-12
Updated: 2017-10-23
Packaged: 2018-12-14 14:33:58
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 2
Words: 7,189
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/11785161
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/FawnChara/pseuds/FawnChara
Summary: Felix and Brad throw Jack a small get together to celebrate him moving to Brighton with some friendly bevs and weed. Shenanigans most definitely ensure.





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> idk i just wanted to get back into writing so this is an extremely self indulgent jelix fic. alternatively titled: “blaze it y’all” and “going gay”. that alone should set the tone for this fic lmao
> 
> (I'm actually really proud with how this turned out?? Idk. Enjoy!)

 

Living in Ireland, even with being part of a heavy metal band in college, Jack never had much experience with drugs.

 

He’d tried a dab once at a party, and after being out of it for hours (and hallucinating just a _little_ bit) Jack ultimately decided it wasn’t for him. Besides, hard drugs made him nervous. They were still very much illegal after all, and it filled his gut with anxiety thinking about the possibility of getting caught. Especially with his YouTube channel now, Jack never really had that much drive to pursue anything illegal. He was fine with the way things were, and he didn’t want to mess things up for a bit of temporary fun.

 

And then he moved to Brighton.

 

“So you’ve really never tried weed before?”

 

Jack shrugged exaggeratedly, taking another sip of his third glass of whiskey. He wasn’t normally a big drinker, but this was a party and moving to a new country deserved some kind of celebration. “Not really. I’ve tried it once but I don’t think I did it right.” He'd been with his old band mates in college at a bonfire, the guys passing around a blunt while they drank some cheap beer. Other than a horrible burning cough, Jack didn't feel much other than the alcohol at the time.

 

Brad snorted, pulling out a plastic baggie full of a green substance Jack was most acquainted with from seeing on television. “What a fuckin’ noob.”

 

“Well _sorry_ I’m not a weed expert,” Jack relied with snark, rolling his eyes.

 

He was currently at Felix’s flat, having a small ‘welcome to the UK’ party, courtesy of the Swede. Signe and Marzia had gone out to dinner and a movie, leaving Jack, Felix, and Brad to their own devices. That being getting absolutely shitfaced before smoking up the apartment.

 

Felix emerged from the kitchen, two mason jars full of red and orange mixed drinks. “Well you’re about to fuckin’ learn, pussy boy.”

 

Jack chuckled, grabbing the glass Felix offered to him before the Swede joined him on the floor where they were gathered. Brad was busying himself stuffing the buds into what Jack assumed was a hot pink grinder. Music blared from the speakers Felix’s laptop was hooked up to, the thrum of the beat a nice comfort to the pounding in Jack’s head.

 

He sipped at his straw, frowning after a moment. “Is there even any alcohol in here? I can’t taste anything.”

 

“Believe me,” Felix assured, “it’s in there.”

 

“I think it needs more vodka,” Jack said as though he hadn’t even heard the Swede, getting up with slight difficulty before heading back into the kitchen. Felix’s snort sounded behind him as he grabbed the bottle of Skyy, pouring more into his drink. He tasted it again, and it still wasn’t strong enough. His drink tasted mostly of orange with a hint of cranberry, so with a shrug Jack poured a bit more in.

 

When he headed back into the living room, drink and vodka bottle in hand, Felix rolled his eyes at him.

 

“We haven’t even gotten to the weed yet, and you’re this fucked up?” he chuckled, eyeing the bottle.

 

Jack shrugged again, taking his seat again beside Felix and sipping at his drink some more. His stomach was warm, comfortably so, but the way the room was spinning was not so nice. It made him close his eyes briefly, leaning on the Swede for support. Felix wrapped an arm around him, giving his opposite shoulder a tight squeeze. Jack sighed in content, sipping more of his drink as he leaned heavily into the other.

 

“Gay,” Brad so helpfully informed, making the others chuckle.

 

“Only for you, Fe,” Jack said, and he had no fucking clue why he did. Stupid alcohol making him say things he really shouldn’t.

 

“Right back at you, baby,” Felix replied quietly with another squeeze to his shoulder, and Jack couldn’t suppress the shiver that went through his spine at the way the word _baby_ rolled off his tongue.

 

Rather than replying Jack chuckled a bit awkwardly, turning his fading attention to Brad as he pulled out a weird glass device. “What’s that?” he asked, slurring heavily.

 

“Wow, you really don’t know anything,” Brad said with a roll of his eyes. Jack would be a little upset at his tone if he weren’t so fucked already. “It’s a bong.”

 

“Wait,” Felix said suddenly, turning to look at the Irishman clinging to his side. “Have you _never_ smoked weed before?”

 

“We’ve already been over this, Felix,” Brad groaned. “He’s practically a virgin.”

 

As Felix’s pale blue eyes focused on his face, Jack shivered again. “So I’m going to take your virginity, then?”

 

“Felix, can you _please_ stop being so sexual? I’m not gone enough for this shit yet,” Brad announced flatly, continuing to prepare the bong.

 

“Yeah, Fe,” Jack agreed, looking away from the Swede’s intense gaze as he fought off a blush. He focused on Brad again, watching the way his large hands moved with a practiced ease loading the bong. Brad was humming along to the music, occasionally singing a line of dialogue, and Jack found himself relaxing against Felix once more. “Brad, you’re like, _ridiculously_ attractive, you know that?”

 

The Englishman’s eyes darted to Jack in something akin to surprise, before he grinned. “Thanks, Jack. Always knew you were gay for me.”

 

“I’m not gay,” Jack insisted, taking another large sip of his drink. “I just really like your beard. And your voice. And your face in general.”

 

“What about me, Jackie?” Felix all but whined. “Do you think I’m attractive?”

 

Jack turned back to the Swede, having to look up at him from where his head was resting on the other’s shoulder. Felix’s face was reddened from the alcohol, and Jack felt warm breaths of air on his own face from where Felix was breathing lightly on him, the scent of vodka almost overwhelming. They were close, probably too close for it to be considered normal, even if they were both drinking.

 

“Nah,” Jack said decidedly, pushing off of the Swede and laughing at the hurt sound he made. “If I’m really gonna go gay for anyone tonight it’ll be Brad. The man has a sexy ass beard.”

 

Brad let out a hearty laugh, grinning as Jack scooted closer to him.

 

Felix pursed his lips in a pout. “But I’m growing my beard out…”

 

“You gotta groom it,” Jack said pointedly, earning another laugh from the Englishman. “Otherwise you just look like a homeless man with bleached hair.” He leaned onto Brad as Felix sputtered indignantly, looking down at the bong as Brad pulled out a lighter. “Is this even okay to be smoking in the apartment?”

 

“It’s fine,” Felix assured with a carefree wave of his hand. “Everyone does it here.”

 

“If you say so.” Jack shrugged, mind too fuzzy to argue any further, settling closer to Brad.

 

“You light it here,” Brad instructed, demonstrating by lighting the bowl. “And place your mouth over it like this. Tilt it at an angle, just put your mouth directly over it. When you inhale, breathe deep from your chest and hold it for a few seconds. Then breathe out.”

 

The instructions were pretty straightforward, and Jack grinned nervously. It was like being in college all over again, except this time it was with a legit glass bong instead of a shittly-rolled blunt being passed around a campfire.

 

He watched as Brad took a hit, licking his lips in anticipation. Felix moved closer to the two, leaning on Jack’s other side. Brad lifted his head, holding the smoke in his lungs, before turning to the open window and breathing out. Jack watched the smoke swirl around in fascination, biting his lip anxiously as Brad handed him the bong.

 

The Englishman looked at him expectantly, and Jack lit it like he was showed. He placed his mouth over the opening, sucking in a breath. The water at the bottom gurgled with his inhale, and Jack startled slightly. The smoke tasted bitter and disgusting on his tongue, and as Jack blew it out the window a harsh cough shortly followed.

 

Brad grinned his approval, slapping him on the back. “There ya go, mate.”

 

The smoke was making his eyes water, and left a horribly bitter taste on his tongue. His coughing fit continued, Jack struggling for proper air. He drank a few more gulps of his drink, eager to get the taste out.

 

“What do you think?” Brad asked after Jack set his drink down again.

 

He paused for a moment.

 

What _did_ he think?

 

It tasted gross, but there was a nice kind of lightness that spread through him. Whereas the booze made him feel heavy and tired, the weed was light and strangely comfortable.

 

Jack turned to Brad with a grin, sluggishly nodding his head. The Englishman laughed, taking the bong back and dumping out the blackened ashes. He quickly refilled it, taking another hit before finally passing it over to Felix.

 

The evening continued in a similar fashion, the boys passing the bong around, chugging their drinks at certain intervals, and taking pictures and selfies of each other acting like idiots. It was fun, and Jack quickly lost himself to the combination of weed and alcohol settling through his body.

 

When Jack awoke the next morning it was early, and bright light filtered through Felix’s thin, white curtains. He sat up with a groan, stretching his arms from his position on the floor. He was incredibly sore, more notably so in his knees and jaw. Sleeping on the hardwood wasn’t such a great idea, but Jack didn’t even remember going to sleep in the first place. His memories weren’t even a fuzzy mess like they usually were after drinking, as instead there were huge gaps. Jack had next to no idea what happened after they started smoking, but he was almost sure his phone could give him some clues.

 

He blinked around in confusion, hand immediately shooting out and near him in search of his phone. He found his glasses first, slipping those on and sighing with relief as his sight became a little clearer.

 

He was on the floor in the middle of the living room, covered with a large comforter, and when Jack looked down he noticed he wasn’t the only one in it. With slight alarm Jack pulled the covers back, not overly surprised to find Felix curled up next to him. He sighed, covering Felix again and turning to look for his phone.

 

His device was nowhere near him, and with another heavier sigh Jack got to his feet. Strangely, his pants and zipper were undone, and as Jack zipped himself back up he reasoned that he probably just got up to piss at some point during the night. He didn’t have a pounding headache like he expected, but his stomach certainly did feel queasy. It wasn’t a great feeling to wake up to, but at least Jack wasn’t bent and heaving over the toilet like he had envisioned.

 

He found Brad in the bedroom, spread out on Felix’s large bed with a simple blanket. Obviously he had covered Jack and Felix with the comforter at some point. Jack searched the bedroom and kitchen briefly, his phone still nowhere in sight.

 

Frowning, Jack headed to the bathroom, stretching his sore muscles on the way. What he saw in the mirror shocked him.

 

His hair was a tangled mess, like he had pretty much expected, and his beard had some weird white flakes in it, but the red marks littering his neck were _definitely_ unexpected. He tugged at his shirt with alarm, pulling it down to expose more skin. His shoulder was in a similar state like his neck, covered with love bites of varying colors and sizes. He blushed heavily, wondering what the _fuck_ happened and who did this to him.

 

Considering he woke next to Felix, Jack had a pretty good idea, but he had no memory of anything like this happening whatsoever.

 

Rather than thinking too hard about it, Jack continued on with his business, taking a quick piss before heading back out to wake the others. He softly kicked Felix repeatedly on his side until the Swede stirred.

 

“Wh-what,” Felix groaned, tugging the covers up over his head as though that would make the kicking stop.

 

“Wake the fuck up,” Jack deadpanned. “Where’s my phone?”

 

“I dunno,” Felix grumbled, voice slightly muffled by the comforter. “Check by the window. That's where you were for most of the night.”

 

Jack frowned at the comment, but relented and moved towards the window, where the laptop was still perched on a pillow from the evening before. The music had long since stopped, the laptop dying from not being plugged in. He lifted the device, and even the pillow to check underneath, but still nothing. His phone wasn't on the windowsill, either. 

 

Their mason jars littered the area, all empty, and the blue Skyy bottle was on its side, also empty. Jack grimaced, realizing how much they all drank. Yet strangely he didn't have the dire urge to throw up, nor the pounding headache that usually accompanied shots and mixed drinks. He figured the weed must have helped with the nausea in some strange way. While he wasn’t hungover, he was definitely still out of it. He wasn’t quite high anymore, the intensity of it having faded significantly. What remained was a dizzy feeling settling throughout his body. It hadn’t been there when he first awoke, but as time went on Jack gradually felt more and more out of it.

 

Jack headed back into the bedroom, stumbling just the slightest bit on the way, and shaking Brad’s shoulder to stir him awake. “Hey, have you seen my phone?” 

The Englishman grumbled, facedown in a pillow.

 

“What?” Jack asked, leaning closer to Brad to try and figure out what the fuck he just said.

 

“Check under the bed.”

 

The suggestion made Jack’s eyebrows shoot towards his hairline, but he backed up and kneeled by the bed nonetheless. There on a pile of shoes and boxes was his iPhone. He quickly snatched it up, wondering how the actual fuck it managed to get under there.

 

A quick click on the home button showed Jack he had several missed calls and messages, mostly from Signe.

 

_Hey we just finished the movie! It was so good, we gotta go back sometime so you can see it too :D_

_Seán?_

_I'm going to assume you guys got really drunk and passed out and not that you're in trouble or anything_

_Okaaayyy well Marzia and I are going back home, give you boys some time to yourselves_

_Have fun!! Don't get too fucked up lol_

 

Jack grimaced, shooting Signe a quick confirmation text that _yes_ he was alive and well and hadn't died from alcohol poisoning or some stupid stunt he might have done while inebriated.

 

With that taken care of, Jack then checked his Snapchat, noticing he had a bunch of messages, mostly from Brad and Felix. 

 

The first from Felix was a selfie the two guys had taken, faces bright and smiling with their tongues sticking out as Jack held the vodka bottle loosely in the hand that wasn't grabbing onto Felix. He quickly screenshotted it with a small chuckle, not remembering it being taken.

 

The second snap was a video, and Jack’s smile quickly dropped. In the ten second video, Jack and Felix were both standing and dancing to the blaring music, one of Felix’s hands on Jack’s hip as he grinded into the Irishman’s ass, the other hand raised and holding the phone to record. Brad was in the background with his own phone out, presumably recording the two as he laughed loudly. The Jack in the video certainly looked like he was enjoying it too, grinning and pushing back suggestively against Felix’s crotch. He turned to the camera and stuck out his tongue with a shit eating grin. The video ended abruptly, and Jack had to forcefully close his mouth from where his jaw had dropped.

 

The next snap from Felix was a picture, another selfie of the two. This time the boys were pressed against each other, Jack holding the camera and grinning with a reddened face as Felix had his face buried into Jack’s neck, sucking marks onto his skin. Jack didn't screenshot this one.

 

Another video was next, and the sight of himself on screen made Jack’s face redden and jaw drop once more. They were in the bathroom, Jack on his knees in front of the Swede, deepthroating him. Felix gripped his green locks tightly with the hand that wasn't recording, thrusting into his mouth. Felix groaned lowly, tugging incessantly at Jack’s hair. Jack’s eyes were watering, but as he pulled off and pumped Felix’s length several times, his grin was back, albeit a little lopsided with spit and cum dribbling down his bearded chin.

 

Jack’s stomach did a little flip, hand reaching up and scratching at his beard in slight disgust. Now he knew why his jaw was so sore and where those white flakes came from.

 

The next snap was another video, playing directly after the one before it. In it Jack opened his mouth for the camera, chuckling as he showed off Felix’s cum pooling on his tongue. Felix hummed in appreciation, taking Jack’s chin between his fingers and tilting his head for a better angle. Jack’s free hand was down his own pants, quickly jerking himself off. Felix’s voice in the video was low and quiet, and it sent a shiver down Jack’s spine. _“Do you wanna cum?”_ video Felix asked, strained and gruffy. The Jack in the video nodded rapidly, eyes tearing up with a slight whimper. _“Swallow. And beg.”_

 

Jack quickly exited the app, as though that would change the fact that he had given Felix a _fucking blowjob._

 

There were so many gaps in his memories from the night before, and the snaps he'd seen had done nothing to jog his memory. He glanced to Felix’s sleeping form in the living room, face red and heated. How the _fuck_ was he supposed to face his friend now, after everything that happened? Were they just going to pretend it never did happen and move on? And even more importantly, did the Swede even remember?

 

Jack mindlessly reopened the app, knowing he still had the ones from Brad to view.

 

The first was a selfie of him and Jack, the two with drinks in hand, sitting by the window. Jack actually remembered this one, them taking it right as they started smoking, the bong not pictured just in front of them. He screenshotted this one, both of them looking pretty normal and smiling in the photo.

 

The next photo had been taken almost directly after the one before it, Jack kissing Brad’s cheek while the Brit’s mouth was open in a smiling laugh. Jack cracked a small smile at the picture, deciding to screenshot this one as well.

 

Up next was a video, Brad sitting on the ground in the corner and recording Jack as he grinded against Felix to the beat of the music, Felix’s own phone out. Jack sighed, not remembering this happening. Brad’s voice was loud in the video, shouting, _“gaaaayyyy!”,_ and the Brit laughed loudly as Felix smacked Jack’s ass, eliciting a delighted moan from him in video. Jack grimaced at the sight.

 

The next video was pretty poorly lit, Brad standing in the dark hall with the camera on his face as he talked in excited, hushed whispers, which unsurprisingly weren’t that quiet at all. _“They’re totally in there fucking! Jack! I know I was joking about you being gay and all but you don’t have to prove me right!”_ He was standing right outside the bathroom, and Felix’s groans could be heard through the door along with Jack’s occasional muffled whines.

 

There was nothing after that video, and Jack was left staring blankly at his screen, feeling both breathless and slightly sick to his stomach now knowing more of what happened during his memory gaps.

 

He and Felix had been play-flirting for quite a while, sure, but to actually act on it? That was another situation entirely. Clearly they both had some kind of pent up feelings for each other that could only be acted upon while in an altered state of mind, and only time would tell for how Jack would be able to handle it.

 

There was movement behind him, and Jack turned in time to see Brad sitting up in bed. His brown hair was a mess, nowhere near as tangled as Jack’s though, and now the Irishman knew why his was so messed up. The image of Felix’s large hand tightening in his green locks as he thrusted into his mouth still burned in his mind.

 

Brad scratched his head lightly, fixing Jack with an amused smirk. “Sorry, Jack, looks like you went gay for Felix last night after all.”

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I really wish Jack had a snapchat tbh. 
> 
> But what did y'all think?? Pls leave a comment and let me know!!!! <3
> 
> If y'all want to add me on snappers: @jennifer_982  
> Also pls feel free to check out my tumblr, send requests n stuff: [fawnsean](http://fawnsean.tumblr.com/)


	2. Chapter 2

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Jack has to face Felix, and ends up trying something new.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry to disappoint, this chapter is pretty mild.
> 
> BUT IM BACK SO WHO CARES RIGHT? haha. Right?? sorry im even high rn so idk but ENJOY

 

Jack tried to push down his nerves.

 

Yet after everything that happened the last time he and Felix got together to party, Jack figured he had a right to be nervous.

 

Nervous about their upcoming get together, that is.

 

Signe and Marzia had decided to go out again, hitting up the mall and movie with dinner afterward, leaving Felix to invite the guys over for another hangout. He even extended the invite to PJ this time as well, and Jack reasoned that with more people there Felix and he wouldn’t be as likely to have a repeat of last time’s incident.

 

The incident which Felix seemed to have no memory of, as well. After Felix had woken properly last time, the Swede had complained of a minor headache, interacting with Jack pretty much as normal. The Irishman had a hard time meeting his friend’s eyes, but that didn’t seem to be the case with Felix. He seemed perfectly comfortable talking with Jack, and since no mention of him giving Felix a fucking blowjob was made, Jack figured that Felix just didn’t remember. 

 

To be fair, Jack didn’t remember doing it either, but seeing those snaps afterward was still very much ingrained in his mind. It was something of a blessing that none of the snaps had been sent to Felix, and Jack figured it made sense, since Felix had been doing a lot of Snapchatting that night.

 

Brad definitely remembered, having a much higher tolerance to weed and alcohol than Jack and seemingly Felix as well. And as Brad liked to make Jack squirm, he’d waggle his brows at Jack and make suggestive hand motions, eyes darting knowingly over to Felix. Jack would merely blush bright red and tell him to shut the fuck up. When Felix seemed confused at how Brad teased Jack, it only reinforced the notion that the Swede didn’t remember anything that they did. 

 

Jack tried not to be disappointed by that.

 

Yet he was also extremely grateful. It was hard enough to face Signe afterward, unsure what to tell her, or if he should tell her anything at all. It ended with him hugging her on the couch, shaking as he sucked in watery breaths. He wasn’t crying, not quite, but the guilt of cheating on her and not even remembering it weighed heavily on him. Signe didn’t know how to react at first, surprised at his sudden grief. She settled for wrapping her thin arms tightly around him, rubbing his back slowly with circular motions and whispering reassurances to him. 

 

When Jack collected himself some time later, she didn’t ask about what happened. 

 

Jack was so,  _ so _ thankful for her support, but he felt even guiltier for not being able to tell her the truth. 

 

One thing was sure, he loved her even more than he thought possible after that encounter.

 

Needless to say, Jack was more than a bit nervous to be surrounded by weed and alcohol once more at Felix’s apartment. Brad and PJ would be there as well, and Jack could try to interact with Felix as little as possible using the other two as buffers, something he’d already been doing. He’d distanced himself from Felix after their first party, not really sure how to cope with the knowledge of what they’ve done. Jack tried not to be obvious about it, but since Signe was out this evening, he couldn’t use her as an excuse to  _ not  _ hang out at the Swede’s apartment.

 

_ It’ll be fine, it’ll be fine, _ Jack repeated this mantra in his head several times as he waited for Felix to pick him up at his house. 

 

When he got the text from Felix with a simple ‘here’, Jack felt a small jolt of panic go through him.  _ It won’t be fine, it won’t be  _ fucking  _ fine! _

 

Swallowing his nerves once more, Jack grabbed his overnight bag and headed out of his house, trembling hands struggling to lock the door properly. He shot Felix a hopefully neutral smile as he approached the car, climbing stiffly into the passenger seat. If Felix sensed something was off with Jack, he made no mention of it as he reversed the car and drove towards his apartment.

 

The two made small talk, Felix mostly occupying the air time, much to Jack’s relief. He knew he wasn’t handling things well, but Jack also knew it would get easier for things to go back to normal with time. That, and Felix would probably be easier to talk to while intoxicated. Definitely not a healthy thought, but true nonetheless. 

 

Brad was already at the apartment when they arrived, at the stove making cheap ramen for dinner. Jack wasn’t hungry as his stomach still swirled with nerves, but he knew he had to eat, otherwise the alcohol and weed would go straight to his head. Smoking and drinking never ended well on an empty stomach. 

 

PJ arrived a few minutes later, and with the whole gang present and the sky darkening out the windows, it was time to party. 

 

It started out much as it had last time, Felix grabbing his laptop and plugging it into the speakers, putting on a playlist full of rap and songs trending on the radio. The familiar tunes were a small comfort to Jack’s nerves, helping him relax just the slightest. 

 

Brad cracked open some beers, Jack taking one with a thankful smile. Brad gave him something of a sympathetic smile, handing out the rest of the beers and settling on the floor beside Jack. The comfort of having someone he could trust so close by helped him calm down some more, and Jack leaned against him gratefully. PJ settled on his other side, leaving Felix still up and moving, setting up some Mario Kart. After handing out the controllers, he sat on Brad’s other side, and Jack sighed quietly with relief. He was still too sober to deal with Felix head on. 

 

No pun intended.

 

PJ slurped his ramen noisily beside him, only taking breaks between his bites to chug at his beer. Jack followed suit, taking large gulps of his beer to further settle his nerves. 

 

By the time his bottle was empty and a warm feeling had settled in his gut, Jack was feeling much better. He definitely hadn’t been in a party mood earlier, it still being too soon after their last party, but Jack was feeling it now. He still hadn’t touched his own bowl of ramen, too occupied with chugging his second beer and destroying the others in Mario Kart. 

 

He was on his third beer by the time the race was over, Jack coming in second to Brad and whining that the Englishman had cheated. PJ griped that at least Jack was second and not third like he was, and Felix groaned exaggeratedly from the far side that everyone had cheated since he came in last. 

 

Felix was drinking at about the same pace Jack was, halfway through his third beer by the end of the game, finishing it off as he told Brad to get the bong out. As Brad busied himself with grinding the little buds of weed and Felix got up to presumably get more drinks, Jack and PJ exchanged drug stories. 

 

“I’ve only smoked a couple of times, so sorry if I’ll be bad at this,” PJ admitted.

 

“It’s fine,” Jack assured, waving his arm. “I’ve only smoked like twice, and once was with these guys.”

 

“PJ, you’ve probably smoked more than Jack has, like,  _ ever,” _ Brad commented with a chuckle.

 

Felix joined them a bit later, fancy glass bottle of whiskey and several wide glasses full of ice in his arms. “Help,” he said quickly, glasses precariously perched. 

 

Jack shot up immediately, grabbing the glasses so Felix wouldn’t drop them.

 

“Thanks, babe,” Felix said, wrapping his newly-freed arm around Jack’s waist as though it were perfectly normal to do so.

 

Jack stiffened at the contact, barely repressing a shiver at the pet name Felix just called him. His eyes darted over to Brad instinctually for help, and the Englishman could only shrug as though to say  _ “it’s Felix, he does whatever he wants”.  _

 

“Ooh, what’d you bring?” PJ asked Felix, eyeing the liquor and more notably a plain paper bag still in his arms, taking no notice of the rising tension. 

 

With Brad sitting by the window loading the bong, Jack could only wordlessly follow as Felix maneuvered them to sit right next to each other, Felix wrapping a firm arm around his shoulders. 

 

“I brought some of my Japanese whiskey,” Felix replied, holding up the mentioned bottle for PJ to see as he scooted closer to the others. His other arm remained unyielding across Jack’s shoulders. “You cunts better appreciate my expensive whiskey,” he said seriously, pointing the bottle at each of them in turn. He then held up the paper bag. “Also I brought a brownie.”

 

“Nice, how strong?” Brad questioned.

 

“Pretty damn strong,” Felix chuckled. He held up the simple, brown paper bag, pulling out a saran-wrapped brownie. It didn’t look like much, but as Felix began unwrapping it the heavy stench of weed immediately hit Jack’s nose. “This whole brownie has 300 mg of THC, which is what makes you feel high,” Felix informed, holding up the brownie for Jack and PJ to see. “Split four ways, we’ll have about 75 each, which is  _ quite _ a lot if you’re not that experienced with edibles.”

 

Jack swallowed hard, eyeing the brownie. He’d never had an edible before, having barely ever smoked dry weed, and he was more than a little unsure how he’d handle it.

 

Felix broke the brownie into four equal-ish pieces, hand brushing purposefully against Jack’s as he handed him his share. 

 

“It’ll hit in about an hour, and will last for around twelve,” Felix said, holding up his own piece for emphasis.

 

“Twelve hours?” PJ laughed. “Damn, good thing we’re starting early tonight then!”

 

“Yeah, no kidding,” Jack agreed with a nervous laugh, trying to ground himself enough to relax again. He placed his bit of brownie on his tongue, the taste of weed in it strong enough to make him grimace.

 

“I know, it doesn’t taste that great,” Felix said quietly, the intimacy of his tone startling Jack slightly. “Just eat it, get it over with, and you’ll feel good in a bit.”

 

Rather than replying, Jack did as told, munching on the brownie with a small frown. The mix of chocolate and weed was obvious from how strong it was, but Jack knew Felix was right. He trusted that he’d be feeling great in a bit.

 

After everyone had eaten their shares, Felix settled against Jack again, re-wrapping his arm around his shoulders, whiskey bottle hanging loosely from his free hand. Having Felix so close after avoiding him from the incident was almost too much to bear, and had it not been for the three bottles of beer already in his system, Jack would have pushed the other off him. Instead, he grit his teeth and bared it, holding out the glasses for Felix to pour the whiskey into. 

 

Two glasses of high quality liquor later and Jack was leaning onto Felix just as heavily as Felix was leaning onto him. He was feeling warm and fuzzy, small grin plastered on his face and pale blue eyes blinking lazily, not really focusing on anything. It hadn’t quite been an hour, but Jack was already feeling the brownie. He thought it was just the alcohol at first, but as time went on Jack gradually became aware that it was finally taking effect. 

 

His ears felt heavy, an odd pressure on his eardrums making him tilt his head side to side in beat with the music. His heart was beating loudly, heavily in his chest. His foot was moving, shaking and tapping uncontrollably. Everything around him seemed to be moving either really fast or really slow, vision distorted. 

 

Jack grinned. Everything felt weird in a good way, and he craved more. 

 

Brad passed the bong to him, Jack needing a second round of instruction after having forgot from last time. This time it was Felix to instruct him, sitting behind him and wrapping his arms around Jack, positioning the bong just right. His mouth was right at his ear, whispering instructions. Jack shivered at the proximity. He wasn’t quite gone enough to not feel guilty for getting a half chub at the feel of Felix’s lips at his ear. 

 

Willing it away he took a hit, inhaling deeply as the smoke thickened in the base of the bong. As he lifted the mouthpiece and inhaled, lifting his head to breathe out, his eyes met with Felix’s baby blues. Felix was looking at him with an intense kind of fascination, and if Jack didn’t know better, he’d label it as  _ arousal.  _ Jack swallowed with sudden nerves, Felix’s eyes darting immediately to the movement of his throat as the Swede licked his own lips. 

 

Jack’s breath caught in his throat. 

 

He wasn’t imagining things, something was happening.

 

There was something going on between the two, and even though he was feeling fuzzy, Jack was still aware enough to realize it.

 

Wordlessly he passed the bong to Felix, hands brushing as the Swede took it. Jack shivered again, no longer phased as he leaned back against Felix’s side. He sat in a silent daze, watching with rapt attention to how Felix licked his lips briefly before placing the bong at his mouth. The water gurgled as he inhaled deeply, white smoke swirling in the bottom of the bong. As Felix removed the mouthpiece and the smoke disappeared from the chamber into his lungs, Jack impulsively reached up and grabbed Felix, crashing their lips together.

 

Felix made a small noise of surprise, relaxing into Jack almost immediately. Heart hammering in his ears, Jack moved his lips against the Swede’s in time with the pounding music, pulling back a moment later and exhaling the smoke he stole from Felix. 

 

Felix watched him with an awed fascination, and as Jack realized what he just did he turned to the other two guys with nothing short of panic.

 

Brad seemed completely unfazed, idly scrolling through the playlist on Felix’s laptop. PJ, on the other hand, was gaping at the two as though he’d just seen a ghost. 

 

“What the  _ fuck _ was that?” PJ said, startled voice cutting through the fog in Jack’s head.

 

“Uh,” Jack murmured smartly.

 

Luckily, Felix seemed to have it covered.

 

“Ha! Got you!” Felix exclaimed, standing up and pointing at PJ like he’d just done something clever. Jack raised a brow at Felix’s outburst, to which Felix only replied with an overly-exaggerated wink.

 

PJ frowned. “I repeat,  _ what the fuck.” _

 

“Don’t worry about it, we just wanted to mess with you,” Felix said with a shrug. “And we totally got you! Who’s the bitch now, motherfucker?”

 

If Jack were more aware of himself, he would have facepalmed. 

 

“Um… okay?” PJ replied uncertainly.

 

“Don’t mind him, he’s just being a dick,” Brad chipped in. 

 

Somehow after that, things returned to normal. ‘Normal’ being the four boys passing around the bong and consuming copious amounts of alcohol to wash out the bitter taste of weed at the back of their throats.

 

The bong made its way back to Jack, PJ handing it to him as he coughed harshly. “Still cherry,” he said, voice small and choked up.

 

Jack blinked at him slowly, trying to figure out what he meant.

 

“It’s still lit,” Felix said helpfully. “Pull hard, and you can get another hit.”

 

Rather than questioning it and making him seem even more like a weed virgin than he was with the terminology, Jack lifted the bong to his lips once more, breathing hard. He pulled back almost immediately, the ashy smoke bitter on his tongue as he coughed. Felix patted him on the back, rubbing circles onto his shoulder. 

 

“There ya go,” Felix murmured, and once again it was in that  _ quiet tone. _ The tone meant just for Jack to hear.

 

Despite his initial nerves, Felix was actually helping him calm down. It might’ve been the weed and alcohol already in his system, but Felix did do some good. He passed the bong to Brad to reload, slumping against Felix with a sigh.

 

Jack felt pretty sure of himself in the beginning, just feeling a light buzz from everything he’d taken, but then he was blinking awake, the room spinning all around him. Everything seemed to be moving, and it took him quite a while to figure out that it was  _ him  _ that was actually moving.

 

“Guys,” Jack croaked, mouth dry. “I think I’m really feelin’ it.” He was still sitting near Felix, but he kept leaning from side to side, the movement helping him in some weird way. All he knew was that it felt really nice to move, especially with how the world was spinning. 

 

“I’d be surprised if you weren’t,” Brad replied, dumping the freshly ground weed out of the grinder and into his tupperware. When had he grabbed more buds to grind?

 

Jack reached for his drink, finding it empty and frowning.

 

“I’ll get you another,” Felix intervened suddenly, startling Jack slightly as the Swede practically disappeared from his side. 

 

Without Felix to lean on, Jack slumped sideways. His head was cushioned, which was nice, and he curled up closer to another body of heat. He wasn’t sure when he closed his eyes, but it was really nice to lay down in the darkness. There was sound all around him, the music, the guys talking, but it was muffled so Jack didn’t bother paying attention to it.

 

Then someone was shaking his shoulder, and he blinked his eyes open to find Felix staring down at him, another drink in hand. Jack opened his mouth to thank him, but something in the other’s facial expression was off. He looked… upset? Why would he be upset?

 

Then Jack realized that the ‘cushion’ under his head happened to be Brad’s thigh that he’d been using for a pillow. 

 

“Are you jealous?” Jack asked, brain-to-mouth filter completely shut off by this point.

 

That seemed to be the wrong thing to say. 

 

Felix’s eyes narrowed as he shoved the drink in Jack’s hands. “Of course not,” he snapped, promptly moving to sit over by PJ, who was off to the side staring intently at the wall as though it were the most fascinating thing in the world. 

 

Jack sat up a bit, fixing Brad with a frown. “Is he mad at me?”

 

“Nah,” Brad said nonchalantly, packing the mouthpiece of the bong with more ground weed. He paused for a moment. “Well. Maybe, I don’t know.”

 

“Thanks for the help” Jack snarked lightly, shooting Felix a worried glance.

 

Brad rolled his eyes with a sigh. “Just ignore him, he’ll get over it in a minute if he can remember that long. Want another hit?”

 

Jack almost said no. 

 

But then the bong and lighter were in his hands again.

 

By the time he was handing it back to Brad, exhaling a large amount of smoke, the Brit chuckled quietly.

 

“What’s so funny?”

 

“You finished it,” Brad said, gesturing to the burnt, blackened bits left in the mouthpiece. 

 

Jack eyed it with a small frown, glancing up at Brad to see the other grinning. Jack burst out into laughter, Brad joining him a moment later, the two cackling as though it were some inside joke. Jack knew there was nothing even remotely funny going on right then, but he just couldn’t stop  _ laughing.  _

 

It was some time later, or a very short time later, Jack couldn’t tell, when PJ finally decided to go to bed. 

 

“Take, uh, just take the guest room.” Felix pointed vaguely in the direction of the hall, clearly out of it. 

 

As PJ stumbled away, Felix staggered up on his own feet. 

 

“I’m gonna, gonna head to bed, too,” Felix announced, beginning to head for his room. 

 

There was pressure at his shoulder, which Jack realized was Brad, prodding at him. 

 

“Go,” Brad instructed.

 

Jack blinked slowly. “Wha–?”

 

“Go with him!”

 

Rather than questioning him further, Jack got up to follow Felix.

 

Or, he tried. 

 

He ended up not being able to stand, settling for crawling down the hall after the Swede. Brad’s laughter could be heard over the music as he crawled away. 

 

And that was how Jack found himself laying next to Felix, in his and Marzia’s bed, facing one another in the darkness. Brad had long since stopped the music, leaving the apartment cast in silence for the night. Jack was painfully aware of how loud their shared breathing was, and soon enough the bed creaked with movement as Felix inched closer, his hand coming up to cup Jack’s cheek softly, as though worried he might spook him.

 

Jack’s breath caught in his throat, reaching up to push the offending hand away. Yet instead of pushing Felix off of him, his fingers only tightened around the Swede’s.

 

When warm, chapped lips were placed against his own, Jack closed his eyes and sighed out in content. Felix’s beard was scratchy, and his mouth tasted like weed and whiskey, but it was perfect. Everything, even in the darkness of the room, was still moving. Jack decided to move along with it. 

 

It was the next afternoon that Jack finally headed home, meekly accepting Felix’s offer for a ride from being way too dizzy to do much else. 

 

“I have to pick up Marzia from your place anyways,” Felix told him.

 

Jack tried not to be overwhelmed with guilt at the mention of her. 

 

He failed.

 

He greeted Marzia as he entered his home, giving her a quick hug and waving her and Felix off as the Swede drove away.

 

He turned to face Signe, her sweet face bright and unknowing as she asked him about his night.

 

“Signe, I have something to tell you.”

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A few people asked me to continue... so now this is a multi-chaptered fic I guess, lol. 
> 
> Hope y'all enjoyed!!


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